Boys will be boys … or human infants of indeterminate gender

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After failed attempts at “making it work” we land on what is truly their best look

Terrible things. We are surrounded by terrible things. By “we” I mean all the mothers of boys and by “terrible things” I mean the fashions.

Oh God, the fashions. I made a promise to myself when I found out I was having all boys that I would not bedeck them in T-Rexes and Grave Diggers. I mean, how presumptive? Who am I to say that these guys are paleontologists or gearheads? From what I can tell, the only things they love are stuffing socks in their mouth and ripping out the hair on the back of my neck, and they just don’t make t-shirts about that kind of stuff.

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The mother and child reunion is only a light year away

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The dreaded end-of-the-day dead stares

There is nothing like coming home at the end of the day, ripping your coat off, throwing your hair into a quick bun so no small hands can tear it out, rushing to where your babies have congregated in the living room and crying, “My babies!” only to have them glance at you in disdain and go back to eating their feet.

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