Pineapples, get your fresh pineapples! According to BabyCenter the trips have reached tropical proportions this week. And I have to admit, it does feel like I’ve got pineapples in there–sharp, spiky things keep poking out of my belly then disappearing when I touch them. I wish I felt more maternal about all the movement inside me, but it actually grosses me out. I know it sounds awful, but it’s hard to get misty eyed over a bunch of pineapples wrestling each other on my organs while I’m just trying to eat a sandwich.
Now that we’re in the final stretch, I’ve entered into Psychotic Nesting Mode. This week alone I’ve scheduled someone to install an exhaust fan in our bathroom, someone to patch the wall after the fan is installed, someone to service our AC, and someone to fix our leaky freezer. We’re also refinancing our mortgage, dealing with the city over who’s responsible for Treegate, trying to find a showerhead to replace the one that Matt accidentally threw away along with his wallet (long story), touching up the paint all over the house, and ripping out weeds in the backyard.
It’s ridiculous, I know. So, I have only myself to blame for having a breakdown at CarMax on Friday. After picking up our newly repaired RAV4 from the shop, I had the bright idea to head over to CarMax and see if we could trade it in for a minivan. Matt and I had seen a pretty sweet Toyota Sienna online, and after test driving it, we were in love. Leather seats! DVD player! Fake woodgrain stuff! Free Cheerio on the backseat! Unfortunately, after inspecting our RAV4, CarMax came back with an absurdly low trade-in offer because of the tree incident–even though we had been assured by our claims adjuster that there was no structural damage to the car. “But we just bought the RAV4 from you guys a year ago,” I stammered. “We barely put any miles on it.” Then, to my horror and the horror of everyone around us, my eyes filled up with tears. There is nothing more mortifying than being enormously pregnant and crying in front of CarMax employees because you can’t get the minivan you want. The one with the Cheerio in it. I mean, people are suffering from famine, disease, and war all over the world. And minivans are not a cool thing to have! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.
I did get a free donut, though.
We decide to put both our cars up for sale ourselves. My mom is generously giving us her backup minivian (“I only use it to transport mulch,” she told me when I asked if she was sure she wanted to part with it.) So at least we have a way to get these pineapples home from the hospital. There may not be a Cheerio in the backseat, but there is a chunk of pine bark. And that’s just as good an omen.